Big Fanfare Please – The New Improved Dory’s Avengers Is Available to Pre-order!

Excited! Buzzing! Finally, after the best part of a year’s editing, re-editing, re-re-editing, re-re-re-re…you get the picture, Dory’s Avengers is due for re-release on Friday 30 September 2016. The manuscript has been professionally proof read (yes, I know what I do for a day job, but not even an editor can proof her own work) – many thanks to Julia Gibbs for her expert work, and the cover art is looking fan-blooming-tastic courtesy of James Willis of Spiffing Covers:

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I’ve managed to upload the manuscript not only to Kindle Direct Publishing, where the e-book is all ready to pre-order (Amazon UK, Amazon USA, Amazon Ca, Amazon Au), but also to Createspace for those of you who prefer a yummy printed book – thank you to Mary Matthews (aka author Georgia Rose) of Three Shires Publishing for teaching me so much at her excellent self-publishing workshop earlier in the year. Hell, I’m even going to be releasing Dory’s Avengers on Audible once I’ve found the perfect narrator – watch this blog for further news on that particular venture. There’s no stopping me now.

#Iamselfpublishing!

But hang on a moment – wasn’t Dory’s published three years ago? About this time of year, with a book launch and signing sessions and lots of champagne?

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Okay, I confess – yes, it was. I’m not going to go into details about what went wrong (mutters dark oaths about vanity publisher dazzling naïve author with false promises); suffice to say, about a year ago I decided to reread my literary triumph and ended up hugely embarrassed by the standard of editing, proof reading and, I have to confess, my own blunders. All the parts I’d been uneasy about but had left in; all the rambling scenes I’d included simply so I could air one amusing phrase; all were there, mocking me and making me want to…give the book a damn good structural edit and re-release it.

And so I did.

I can honestly say I am delighted with everything to do with the revised edition of Dory’s Avengers, and I’m looking forward to sharing more blog posts and snippets from the book on An Author’s View in the weeks leading up to the big launch on 30 September. If you bought a copy of the original and feel tempted to give the sleek new version a try, please contact me and I will give you a free copy, if possible in the format of your choice. If not, I hope you will purchase a copy, love it and leave me a peachy review, but I will be equally interested to know your reasons if you’re not keen. If people are reading Dory’s Avengers, I will be one happy author. You, dear readers, are after all the reason why I write.

Writing Tips – Show, Don’t Tell

Consider the following passage:

John-Paul was a successful businessman. He was six foot tall and athletically built, with blue eyes and blond hair. His brother was called George. John-Paul was a rich man who drove a Jaguar and owned a large house in the suburbs. All his family holidays were taken abroad and they always flew first class. His parents were huge fans of the Beatles, which was how John-Paul got his name. He was named after John Lennon and Paul McCartney. Despite being rich and powerful, John-Paul was a kind hearted man…blah, blah, blah

Snore – oh, do excuse me. I dropped off for a minute there.

If this passage were to be used as notes for the author’s own reference, fine. Even if this were a first draft, there’s plenty that the author can edit and refine at a later date – as long as they do edit and refine it. Sadly, though, I have encountered self-published books (clearly un-edited) which actually begin like this, bombarding the reader with far more information than they can take in at once. Whether or not the writing style improves I can’t say, as by page four I’ve usually given up.

Why?

Because it’s boring.

So how does an author get information across to their readers in a way they’ll enjoy and remember? Two ways: one, introduce the information bit by bit so the readers can gradually get to know the characters as they’d get to know someone they’d met in the “real” world. This is also true for places, background information – anything essential to the story.

Two, pretty much anything can be shown to the readers. They don’t need to be told when they can work it out for themselves.

John-Paul parked in his reserved parking space and locked his expensive car, then strode with natural athletic grace towards the door of the pristine Financial District skyscraper in which he worked.

What does the reader now know about John-Paul? Well, he’s rich (expensive car), successful (he has a reserved parking space in the Financial District) and he keeps himself fit (couch potatoes don’t tend to have athletic grace). However, not one of these facts has been stated in so many words.

On the way into work, John-Paul’s blue eyes alighted upon a homeless man, shivering as he sold copies of the Big Issue. Making a detour into the nearest Starbucks, John-Paul ordered a large coffee then crossed the road.

“Here you are, Joe,” he said, handing the steaming drink to the Big Issue seller. “Milk and two sugars, just as you like it.”

From this our readers can deduce the blue-eyed John-Paul is kind hearted, clearly on a regular basis (he’s friendly enough with Joe to know his name and how he takes his coffee), and they don’t need to be Sherlock Holmes in order to make the deduction.

Later that day:

Walking into the bar to meet his friends, John-Paul was transported back to his childhood as “Love Me Do” rang out from the jukebox. Growing up with two Beatles fanatics as parents, he and his brother George had passed every day of their formative years to a soundtrack of the Fab Four’s music.

(I didn’t have the heart to give John-Paul another brother called Ringo!)

John-Paul’s visit to the pub tells the readers enough about his childhood for them to work out for themselves how he got his name – and please don’t try to explain for the benefit of readers who may not be familiar with the Beatles. Can you imagine it?

John-Paul was called John-Paul after Lennon and McCartney because his parents loved the Beatles. That is John Lennon and Paul McCartney, you understand, the main songwriters behind the Beatles, the highly successful sixties band

Snore, indeed!

When I first started editing, I myself wasn’t clear on what writing coaches and other experts meant by “Show, don’t tell”. It sounded like great advice, but how did it actually work in practice? Fittingly enough, I was shown the answer to this question via some of the manuscripts on which I was working, and the first intimation I had was through dialogue:

James and Minnie met for coffee.

“Hi, James, the usual?” said Minnie.

“Yes please,” said James gratefully.

“Two lattes please,” said Minnie to the barista. “So, James, how are you?” she asked, turning back to James.

“Great thanks, Minnie,” said James happily. “I’ve just won the promotion I was after at work, and my daughter’s been accepted to study at Cambridge,” he added proudly.

“My daughter can’t even be bothered to get up in the morning to go to the job centre,” said Minnie jealously.

“I’m sorry to hear that, Minnie,” said James sympathetically.

“Oh great, that makes all the difference,” said Minnie sarcastically.

I’ve added far more information than is needed in the above example. Let’s break it down.

“Hello, Minnie,” said James.

We already know that James and Minnie are the only characters involved in the scene, so “Hello, Minnie” is enough to show the readers that it’s James speaking. There’s really no need to tell them.

“I’ve been promoted and my daughter’s going to Cambridge.”

I’m sure the readers can work out from this statement how James is feeling. The words he’s spoken have shown them he’s proud – well, he’s hardly going to be feeling embarrassed about successful job promotions and prestigious university places. Sometimes, of course, you will have to tell the readers who’s speaking and who’s listening, but wherever possible ask yourself if you can dispense with the constant “he said”, “she said” after every piece of dialogue. Your writing will flow far better for it.

As well as showing the readers who is talking and how they’re feeling, dialogue can also give them plenty of clues about the characters’ personalities (Minnie is obviously rather a bitter and jealous woman, unable to appreciate her friend’s successes as she’s so bogged down by her perceived failures), their lives (James is clearly making a success of his, and they each have at least one daughter) and their tastes (they both enjoy a latte).

Now, I have done editing work for many authors who instinctively use the show rather than tell technique, and as a result their writing style is wonderful. Without doubt, their readers will be hungry for more. However, while having no intention of being patronising, I felt this post was a worthwhile exercise as there are plenty of authors, including those who already “get it”, who ask me to explain show, don’t tell. I hope I have succeeded.

This week I’ve touched upon dialogue, which is a favourite of mine both to read and to write, so next week I’ll delve into it in more depth.

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If you’re an author looking for an editor and you’d like more information on the services I offer, please either click on the image below or email me directly on alisoneditor@outlook.com.

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Writing Tips – Self-Editing

What? A professional editor advising writers to self-edit? Surely not!

I’d like to make one thing abundantly clear right now: I am advising self-editing in addition to employing both a professional editor and a proof reader, not instead of doing so. Even the best writers in the world will miss crucial mistakes in their manuscript – unrealistic timelines, misleading or superfluous storylines, howling typos – because they’re simply too close to it. When an author’s eaten, slept and breathed their manuscript for weeks, months or even years, they get to the point where they may be reading the words on the page, but what their brain’s seeing is whatever they intended to write. (‘He visited they’re house’ made a valiant attempt to sneak into my debut novel, despite me reading the manuscript through about 100 times. Thank God for proof readers!)

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So why self-edit at all? Why not hand your manuscript over to the professionals the second you type ‘The end’ and have done with it? Two words – first draft. Do you really want someone else seeing the initial results of your brain going into overdrive while your hands struggled to type the words fast enough? No, neither do I. Furthermore, many editors and proof readers charge per 1,000 words, so if you can rein in the word count it’ll gain you some Brownie points with your bank manager too.

Self-editing is very relevant to me at the moment since I spent my Christmas break working through my own novel, Dory’s Avengers, due for re-release later in the year. I did this with the benefit of hindsight, extensive editing experience and the constructive criticisms of a number of reviewers, none of which I had four years ago when I first signed up to publish (with a vanity publisher – big mistake). Back then the manuscript weighed in at a whopping 163,000 words; I’ve since cut out 40,000 words of waffle and over-emphasis, rewritten passages that struggled, and dealt with characters acting out of character (why would someone who’s snivelling and needy in one chapter suddenly become admirably strong willed in the next?) and knowing things they couldn’t possibly know. (Just met someone for the first time? Well naturally you’re going to know all the names of their extended family – not!) Having done all this, though, I will still be employing professionals to go over my work before I publish. Yes, even editors use editors.

If you’re not happy with parts of your manuscript, the likelihood is your readers won’t enjoy those parts either. Can they be amended? Do they need to be included at all? Does your prologue (if you have one) entice people to read on or turn out the light and go to sleep? Does your epilogue (if you have one) add anything to the story, or is it just that you can’t let go? (Yep, been there, done that.) I know scrutinising every part of your manuscript will take time, but it’s well worth the effort.

Over the coming weeks I will share with authors following my blog the writing tips I’ve compiled from my three years as an editor, but I want to emphasise that these are only tips, not rules. You are the creative talent behind your manuscript and it’s essential that your author voice is heard; I merely make suggestions to help you produce a sublime reading experience. Next week I intend to tackle the ‘show don’t tell’ concept you may have heard writing coaches and other such experts lauding. Many authors ask me about that one, but it’s really not as daunting as it sounds. However, I recognise it’s not enough simply to wag an admonishing finger and say, ‘Ah, you should show your readers, not tell them’. It would be a lot better if I actually – well – showed you!

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If you’re an author looking for an editor and you’d like more information on the services I offer, please either click on the image below or email me directly on alisoneditor@outlook.com.

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Dory’s Avengers Book Launch – One Year On

One year ago today was the best day of my life. I went to bed on 28 August 2013 as a mere mortal, and woke up the next day as a published author.

IMG_1521Wow, I’m a published author. Those words still bring the hairs up on the back of my neck. My publication day, complete with book launch in the Cambridge branch of Waterstones, was everything I’d daydreamed it would be – and boy, can I daydream! Dory’s Avengers was released into the world in style; friends and family gathered to help me celebrate, sales were healthy and I managed to get through my speech without tears, despite coming close as I spoke of how I wished my sorely-missed parents could have witnessed my momentous day. Not so sure my mother would have approved of some of the choice language occasionally used by Dory’s Avengers’ more forthright characters, though…

One year on, I’m reminiscing fondly about my book launch. OK, I’ll admit I had expected to have attended a star-studded Dory’s Avengers film premier by now, or at least be anticipating the autumn airing of a Dory’s Avengers BBC drama. Sadly, neither has materialised. Would I have published via a different route if I’d known two years ago what I know now? Quite probably. Things haven’t really gone as I’d hoped at all, but nothing can detract from the memories of my wonderful publication day, or my pride in having published such a beautiful book, and nothing ever will.

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The last year has seen my life go through yet more changes. During the publishing process I found out I have a natural aptitude and a huge enthusiasm for editing, and my fledgling copy-editing business, Alison’s Editing Service, is starting to find its wings and fly. Back in April I met fellow author, prolific blogger and champion of independent authors, Debbie Young, following a talk she was co-hosting at the Cambridge Literary Festival. Two days later we met up again at London Book Fair, where Debbie introduced me to Helen Hart, publishing director with SilverWood Books. This forward-thinking company offers every service a self-publishing author needs to produce a professional work – including copy-editing. I am proud to say that I have been employed by SilverWood Books to edit a number of manuscripts, and thanks to this work, along with manuscripts from an ever growing group of independent authors who like my editing style, I am lucky enough now to be making a living doing something I love.400dpiLogo

If anyone had told me a year ago that by the time I celebrated the first anniversary of my book’s publication I’d be successfully running my own business, the likelihood is I’d have laughed in disbelief. Mind you, if anyone had told me three years ago I’d realise my dream to become a published author it would probably have elicited a similar reaction.

Happy anniversary, Dory’s Avengers.

Champagne, anyone?

Book Launch Champagne 1

Happy New Year, Happy News.

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I’m delighted to say I’ve started 2014 in a very positive frame of mind – well, once I got over the raging New Year’s Day hangover, that is! My editing website is gradually being tweaked into shape, and I’m finishing work for the authors who so kindly donated their manuscripts to help me hone my editing skills. Once that’s done, and more lovely manuscripts come rolling in for editing, then Alison’s Editing Service will be officially launched.

You may remember that I had a stall at the Mill Road Winter Fair last month, where I met a group of lively youngsters giving away copies of local magazine Cambridge Edition. Well, today I fired off a tweet to them, and within minutes was invited to get in touch and organise an interview to feature in a future issue.

Cambridge Edition

More information on that once it’s arranged, because I have some super exciting news, and this one’s a definite…

I’m going to be on the radio on Monday! Yes – Sue Dougan at BBC Radio Cambridgeshire has invited me to give an interview on her lunchtime show, and I am very excited about that.

The future’s looking good. Happy New Year.

Exciting Day.

I’m delighted to say that The Corporeal Pull by Sara B Gauldin is now available to buy on Kindle.

UK Link   USA Link   Canada Link

You’ll understand why I’m so excited when you see the name of the editor.

The Corporeal Pull is a very good read, which will appeal to fans of the paranormal and mysteries, while romantics will love the developing relationship between the lead characters. I highly recommend it.

To find out more about my editing service, please click on the ‘Editing’ tab above.